Dave & Buster’s offers free unlimited gameplay Saturday for Daves, Anns and Busters

If your name is Dave, Ann or Buster, congratulations: Tomorrow is quite literally the only day in history your name has come with a tangible financial benefit.

Dave & Buster’s announced this week that for National Video Games Day on Saturday, Sept. 12, anyone named Dave, David, Davy, Ann, Ana, Anna, Anne, Annie or Buster gets free unlimited game play at any participating location. All you have to do is show up before noon with a government-issued ID, be among the first 200 people in line and prove that, yes, your parents really did name you that.

First name or last name — it doesn’t matter. If it’s on the ID, it counts.

Let’s unpack this for a moment.

There are roughly 4.5 million Davids in the United States. There are millions of Anns and Annas and Annies. There is, statistically speaking, at least one person named Buster, and that person has been waiting their entire life for this moment. Tomorrow morning, all of them will have something in common: They will be standing outside a Dave & Buster’s at 11:45 a.m. pretending they’re not competitive about being first in line while absolutely being competitive about being first in line.

For the rest of us — the Fizzes, the Tracys, the Big Mics of the world — the news is still pretty good. Dave & Buster’s is also running half-price games all day Saturday for walk-in guests, regardless of what your birth certificate says. So even if your parents named you something wildly unhelpful like “Bartholomew” or “Fizz,” you can still get in on the action.

A few things worth noting before you set your alarm:

• It’s first come, first served. Only the first 200 guests per store location before noon qualify for the free unlimited play. After that, you’re paying like the rest of us mortals.
• Bring your ID. Not a business card. Not a monogrammed towel. A government-issued photo ID.
• Exclusions apply. The deal doesn’t cover Virtual Reality, The Arena, Game Suites or the Human Crane. If you don’t know what the Human Crane is, it’s exactly what it sounds like, and you’re not playing it for free tomorrow.
• One per person. No, you cannot go through the line twice wearing a fake mustache. I asked.

Now, I want to speak directly to the Busters of the world. There can’t be that many of you. This is your Super Bowl. Your Coachella. Your moment. You have spent your whole life having people ask, “Wait, Buster? Like … Buster Buster?” and tomorrow, for the first time ever, that name gets you unlimited Skee-Ball. Don’t waste it.

And for those of you frantically googling “can I legally change my name by tomorrow” — I respect the hustle, but no. You cannot. I checked.

Happy National Video Games Day, Colorado. May the Daves be swift, the Anns be strategic and the Busters finally get the respect they deserve.